The many things I wish for today.

miscellaneous

“I wish finding likable people with whom I could socialize and build history wasn’t such a Cyclopean feat. That’s right, I said Cyclopean.”

You might be thinking, what does that horse picture have to do with this post? Nothing. It’s just a cheap ploy to get your attention, as often my illustrations are in fact.

Some days, amazingly, I don’t really feel like externalizing my vibrant inner monologue. On these days I just want to blend into the desert scenery, become a part of the landscape, disappear into a gerbil hole. But I am not a cactus or a gerbil, so I resign myself to eating tons of candy (has anyone seen those giant M&M’s called Megas? Incredible) and making lists. Here goes.

I wish my hair would quit growing, cutting it really puts me out.

I wish I could understand the attraction of Twitter & Instagram, but I fear I am falling behind and modernity is no longer in my purview.

I wish I could write plot as well as I can write emotion and dialogue, then I could identify myself as a writer & not just a writer type. But no such luck.

I wish I could mourn less those moments passing or passed, and celebrate more the moments yet to come.

I wish the hint of sadness which resides perennially in my heart would vacate its chambers, and move, preferably out of the country. I hear France is nice this time of year.

I wish people didn’t assume my boobs were fake, it really bothers me, because I really can’t stand breast implants and women who get them. Sorry women, not sorry.

I wish pointed words made themselves readily available when I need them, and not 3 hours later when I don’t.

I wish memory was a trustier, less precarious component of my intellect.

I wish Santa Clause was real and cancer wasn’t. I know that’s a bit reductionist. The heart wants what it wants.

I wish desiring and possessing weren’t mutually exclusive.

I wish finding likable people with whom I could socialize and build history wasn’t such a Cyclopean feat. That’s right, I said Cyclopean.

I wish syrup was a constant table side accompaniment like salt or pepper.

I wish once a month my uterus didn’t have to undergo such tremendous discomfort.

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81 thoughts on “The many things I wish for today.

  1. I’d worry less about how many syllables the words you use have. “I wish pointed words made themselves readily available when I need them”. Thats original, its yours and it conveys your point efficiently.

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    1. Sweetheart, plz come up with and original thought of your own before critiquing my syllabic choices and offering up backhanded compliments. I’d worry less about other people’s writing styles and more about why it is that i feel compelled to make snotty commentary which is neither founded in fact nor welcome, if i were you. Cheerio

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        1. You need a lesson in compliment paying then. Telling someone that they “worry” about the utilization of big words is obnoxious & patronizing, the “compliment” mixed in thereafter is thusly null & void. Try again if it is sincerity & not an insult you are trying to serve up

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          1. Sorry I forget that I’m part of the evil patriarchy, but I wasn’t insinuating that you dont know what those big words mean because you do based on how you used them just thats I dont think its necessary to get your point across.

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            1. Ok well it is necessary by my standard of language is i am merely transcribing my inner monologue, that is what i think like, in those words, and it isn’t on my blogging agenda to dumb down my narrative for those who prefer to communicate in growls and grunts.

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                    1. Well I mean honestly how do you take most of what’s posted seriously. People have lost all sense of humor and want to live in an echo chamber. So yeah I guess I’m the norm. Cool story bruh.

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                    2. It i dont like someone’s writing, i opt
                      Out of their chamber. This isn’t a writing class and your taste is not the standard by which all writing is to be measured. I dont think obnoxiousness is the norm at all here. People blog mostly for catharsis, not for critique. I dont know why i am even saying this to you, i know your prerogative is just clown about.

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                    3. Its not about writing style its about the substance they spew. I can tell youre still mad over my compliment to your post, which you mistook for a critique.

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                    4. Honestly I find you a bit narcissistic, assuming that I want to connect with you and talking about how you wish people wouldn’t think your boobs are fake.

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                    5. Er ok? Just because something doesnt present you with an accurate mapping of someone’s soul, doesn’t mean it’s without meaning or purpose of its own kind. The blogosphere is exactly what it is, it’s not a microscope it’s a fun house mirror, and it performs its function swimmingly. It failing your expectations doesn’t a toilet make, it means you ought to adjust your expectations.

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  2. That reminds me of the R.E.M. ballad of Cyclops love… “This one goes out to the one-eyed love…” 🙂

    Meanwhile, on breast implants… here’s a surprise seriously thoughtful response. For the most part I agree with you, BUT there is a huge caveat. Just like you should never approach a woman with a large belly and ask her “when are you due” you should be careful pre-judging a woman with implants lest ye run into a woman who has survived breast cancer (to tie in another of your topics) by double-mastectomy and has had reconstructive surgery.

    I am glad I fully thought through my opinions on “fake boobs” before I ever accidentally made anyone who had them for a valid reason self-conscious. I’m not saying you did that… I’m just saying that’s the caveat scenario under which I have no judgement about implants.

    The people who get them purely for vanity reasons like other cosmetic surgeries are on their own to defend themselves.

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  3. “I wish my hair would quit growing.” I never wished that, but it was granted. No comment on monthly the uterus trauma, but seriously, those boobs are fake, right? I’m glad that Santa is not real, but I also wish cancer wasn’t real either. As to syrup being a condiment, it is, if you think of tomato syrup (i.e., ketchup). Hey, you didn’t say what kind of syrup. And I’m kind of glad that desiring and possessing are not one and the same. Cyclopean feat? You mean like one enormous, doofus guy with a single large eye in the middle of his head? Hell, if that’s what you’re looking for, it’s no wonder you’re having trouble finding likable people with whom you could socialize and build history.

    Overall, though, some good wishes. Or well wishes?

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    1. Lol cyclopean is an adjective, i am not looking for a cyclops! Maple syrup.
      No comment on boobs, nunya business. I dont want to have less hair, i just want it to not get longer lol..i can tell you read w care and took notes! As always it’s appreciated!!! 😛

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        1. Maybe the uterine discomfort too? I’m trying to be a good girl so Santa takes off at least half my list. The other half is on the Tooth fairy’s roster as i got like half my teeth pulled this year to be replaced by implants, that bitch owes me.

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          1. Yeah. Forgot about the uterine issue. Although there those who know me who would probably claim I have my time of the month as well. I’ll put in a good word with the Tooth Fairy for you. I’ve got connections. My cousin-in-law is a retired dentist.

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